Application of Effective Discipline by Boss Man


Psychologyx- Application of Effective Discipline by Boss Man
The effectiveness of a supervisor in performing managerial tasks become very important for the company's operations. In a journal entitled Effective delivery of workplace discipline: Do women have to be more participatory than Men, by Joan FB, Leanne EA, and David AW (2005), addressing both male and female managers have the same degree of effectiveness in terms of performance, motivation of the leader and employees, managerial ability, employee productivity and group level.

There should also be noted, not all effective managerial duties performed by male or female boss. Manager of men and women have different strengths and weaknesses in order to achieve the effectiveness of managerial duties. Strengths and weaknesses can occur due to biological factors or differences in social roles.

There are a wide range of managerial duties in managing a company, including supporting the establishment of the discipline of the workers. This process includes the direction and influence in determining the behavior of workers, where the behavior is right and behaviors that support job performance. When this process is blocked, it will affect the course of an organization.

Not only the managers who supervise several workers and managerial task, it is also done by a supervisor. Supervisor has discretion in determining which issues requiring disciplinary action and what action is appropriate in responding.

EA revealed by Leanne, James AC, and David AW (2000) in Journal of Management, volume 27, the application of discipline to be effective when performed by men than by women superiors. Sex role stereotypes and social roles have differences in the view of men and women. Where women have not excelled in the application of administering discipline than men.

Most people believe that the behavior of women is expected to be gentle, sensitive, passive and supportive. They will suffer and the less effective when done on the application of discipline than male workers.

Application of discipline by superiors is a task requiring masculine characteristics. Based on the results of a survey conducted by Joan, et al., On 263 undergraduate business students showed that about 85% of respondents said that the application of discipline by superiors suitable for those who have masculine characteristics oriented. 86% of respondents said that the application of penalties also require masculine characteristics oriented. Demonstrate the role of masculine gender-oriented stereotypes in men with feminine oriented to women.

However, whether this occurs in our society? The emergence of resistance between the role of masculine gender stereotype in men with feminine oriented oriented to women, where the application of discipline on top task not only be done by the boss man, who according to the gender stereotype oriented masculine characteristics, but also her boss.

A study by Supriyadi (2005) in the journal Humanities volume 17, 195-203 provides a view on the issue of androgyny that is currently developing, in which the masculine and feminine character limit is not clear melt. Already many of the awareness of women who adopt the view of androgyny in their movements, like feminism or gender equality.

Narcissistic personality disorder

Psychologyx- Narcissistic personality disorder
Narcissistic derived from a Greek mythology, Narcissus was so proud of her good looks. One day, he wandered into the woods and met with a fairy named Echo. Attracted by the beauty Narcissus, Echo express love, but was refused. This rejection hurt Echo, and made her cry.

Aphrodite, goddess of love, know this and try to reply to Narcissus. Narcissus when drinking at a river, Aphrodite asked Cupid to shot him with arrows of love. Narcissus fell in love with his reflection in the river. He died with a look at his own reflection.

In psychological studies, people with narcissistic personality disorder have an ego and the need for high praise. Another characteristic of narcissistic personality disorder believe that they are more superior than others and tend to be less sensitive to the feelings of others. However, behind the high ego, they do not like being criticized.

Narcissistic personality disorder is not the same with confidence or to have high self-esteem. Those who suffer from narcissistic, thought highly of him. While a healthy person, do not view themselves more than the others considered.

According to psychoanalysis, this disorder arises because parents do not appreciate what the children and tend to tell their parents what had been achieved. For example, if the child tells the story of his success to be ranked one in school, but parents do not appreciate and tell you what happened in the office.

Parents always have an important and central role in child development. Should, more parents appreciate what has been done by children.

Learn to Forgive, Improve Mental and Physical Health


Psychologyx- Learn to Forgive, Improve Mental and Physical Health
According to the Mayo Clinic, to pardon or forgive it will feel good for your health.

Grudge appears to affect the cardiovascular and nervous systems. In one study, people who focus on a personal vendetta, has blood pressure and heart rate, and increased muscle tension. This coupled with the feeling of less control. When someone manages to forgive those who hurt them, many of them are said to feel more positive and relaxed. Other studies have shown that forgiveness has a positive effect on your psychological health.

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, forgiving is releasing anything that has happened. This is indeed a pain, but the problem would go away if you let it go. Off with the burden of anger and hatred.

There is no single approach to learning how to forgive someone. Talking with a friend, therapist or counselor (religion) can help the process to sort through feelings and stay on the right track. A tips or ways to learn to forgive as written by the Mayo Clinic Women's HealthSource in Science Daily, is.

    Acknowledge the pain and anger that you feel as a result of the actions of others to you.
    Recognizes that in order to escape the pain that requires change.
    Try to think about the person who hurt you. What makes it do that? Sometimes there is no motivation or reason that makes the painful events that happened to you. For some people, this step ends by saying, "I forgive you."
    When you successfully make and release, there is the emotional relief that comes with forgiveness.

Definition, Causes and How to Overcome Temper Tantrum


Psychologyx- Definition, Causes and How to Overcome Temper Tantrum
Understanding the behavior of angry temper tantrums in preschool children. They express their anger by lying on the floor, kicking, screaming, and sometimes hold their breath. Tantrums are a natural, occurs in children who have not been able to use words to express their frustration, because the non-fulfillment of their wishes.

Quoted Colorado State University Extension, R.J. Fetsch and B. Jacobson said that tantrums usually occur at the age of 2 to 3 years when children form a sense of self. Toddlers do not quite understand the word "I" and "wants her" but it's very easy to know how to satisfy what they want. Tantrums are the result of high energy and ability that is insufficient in expressing a desire or need "in the form of words".

Tantrums usually occur at the age of 2 and 3 years, will begin to decline at age 4 years. They usually have it within a year. 23 to 83 percent of children ages 2 to 4 years have had temper tantrums.

Most of the children throw tantrums at certain places and with certain people. They will usually do this when they know there is no prohibition "no" to something he wants to do. When other family members respond with rudeness and tantrums even hit, then the problem will increase. Tantrum usually stops when the child gets what he wants. Levels of child anger child depends on how the amount of energy and patience are also parents.

There are many reasons why temper tantrums. Some causes are indicators of family problems: inconsistent discipline, criticize too much, parents who are overprotective or neglectful, children do not have enough love and attention from their parents, problems with marriage, interruption of play, both for the emotional problems of parents , meeting strangers, rivalry with a brother or sister, have problems with speech, and disease or illness. Other common causes include hunger or fatigue.

Children who are angry often have other problems such as thumb sucking, head banging, wetting the bed and have trouble sleeping. If this behavior occurs, or if your child is angry more than 15 minutes or occur more than three times a day, get help from an expert such as a child psychologist.

Parents can learn how to maintain and effectively enforce discipline. Too permissive with a loose discipline made all things must be fulfilled. Conversely, too authoritarian parenting is not good, try to use one-time parenting styles with more listening to the voice of children. Authoritarian parenting style is a style of parenting that do not recognize the rights of children. The point is balance in the care, discipline when parents need to act and when to listen to the wishes and rights of children.

Quoted from Children's Hospital of Philadelphia, the following are the most precise instructions on how to cope with and benefit temper tantrums:

    Stay calm.
    Keep doing your activity. Ignore the child until he is calm and show the rules that have been agreed.
    Do not hit your child. Better held her in his arms until he was calm.
    Try to find a reason for your child's anger.
    Do not give in to anger child. When parents give in, children learn to use the same behavior when they want something.
    Do not coax your child to return the other to stop the anger. Children will learn to get rewards.
    Point your child's attention on something else.
    Remove objects that your child from potentially harmful.
    Give praise and recognition when the tantrum behavior has been completed.
    Still keep open communication with your child.

Hope it helps, the explanation of the meaning, causes and how to deal with temper tantrums is tempered tantrum

10 Ways to Increase Your Emotional Intelligence


Psychologyx,
10 Ways to Increase Your Emotional Intelligence,  Everyone always talks about Emotional Intelligence (EI), in the Indonesian language is called emotional intelligence or emotional intelligence, but what exactly is it? One important aspect of emotional intelligence is the ability to understand, control and evaluate the emotion - in yourself and others - and use it as the appropriate information.

For example, emotional intelligence in yourself can help you organize and manage your emotions, while recognizing the emotions of others can create empathy and success in your relationships, both personal relationships and professional relationships.

In 1990, Yale psychologist John D. Mayer and Peter Salovey coined the term emotional intelligence, which some researchers claim that this is an innate characteristic, while others show that you can develop and improve it.

Perhaps not all of you have a psychotherapist to improve your emotional intelligence, but now you can become your own therapist. The same was done by Freud, a figure of psychoanalysis. It all begins with learning how to listen to your feelings. Although it is not easy, developing the ability to manage your own emotions, but this is the first and most important step.

Norman Rosenthal, MD, a psychiatrist and researcher explain seasonal affective disorder in a book entitled "The Emotional Revolution", quoted from psychology today (05.01.12), here are 10 ways to improve your emotional intelligence:

    Try to feel and understand your feelings. If you feel uncomfortable, you may want to avoid because of annoying. Sit down, at least twice a day and asked, "How am I feeling?" Might take a bit to feel it. Put yourself in a comfortable space and protected from outside interference.
    Do not judge or change your feelings too quickly. Try not to ignore your feelings before you have a chance to think about it. Healthy emotions often rise and fall in a wave, rising to peak, and decreases naturally. The goal is not to cut off a wave of your feelings before reaching the peak.
    See if you find a relationship between your current feelings with the same feelings in the past. When difficult feelings arise, ask yourself, "When I felt this feeling before?" Doing this search can help you to recognize when emotions today is a reflection of the current situation, or events in your past.
    Connect your feelings with your thoughts. When you feel there is something that strikes with amazing, try to always ask, "What I think about it?" Often, one of our feelings would be contrary to the mind. That is normal. Listen to your feelings is like listening to all the witnesses in court cases. Only by recognizing all of the evidence, you will be able to reach the best decision.
    Listen to your body. Dizziness in the head while working may be a clue that your work is a source of stress. A rapid heart rate when you'll meet a girl and ask her out, perhaps an indication that this would be "a real thing." Listen to your body with sensations and feelings, that the signals they allow you to get the power of reason.
    If you do not know how you feel, ask for help from others. Many people rarely realize that other people can assess how we feel. Ask someone who knows you (and who you believe) how they look at your feelings. You'll find a surprising answer, good and enlightening.
    Log into your subconscious. How do you feel more aware of your subconscious? Try free association. In a relaxed state, let your mind wander freely. You can also do dream analysis. Keep a notebook and pen beside your bed and start writing down your dreams as soon as you wake up. Give special attention to dreams or recurring dreams involving a strong emotional load.
    Ask yourself: What am I feeling right now. Start by assessing the amount of welfare that you feel on a scale of 0 and 100 and write in a diary. If you look extreme feelings in one day, take a minute or two to think about the relationship between mind and your feelings.
    Write down your thoughts and feelings when it is on the decline. A study showed that by writing down your thoughts and feelings can be very helpful to know your emotions. A simple exercise like this can be done several hours per week.
    Know when to re-look out. There is time to stop looking into you and turn your focus outward. Emotional intelligence involves the ability not only to look into, but also to be present in the world around you.

How To Build Happiness in the Workplace


How To Build Happiness in the Workplace
Psychologyx - Many of us have jobs to earn a living. If you work after graduating from college at the age of 20 years, then retired at the age of 60 years, and you have a lifespan of 70-80 years, mean you work for an 40-year, nearly 50% of your life. It is clear that the quality of your work experience may affect the overall welfare of your life.

You may have heard from family members, friends, or even other people who feel stressed at work and decided to look for another job. In fact, new jobs can not guarantee you to live a happier working life. Is there anything we can do to increase our happiness in the workplace?

Lyubomirsky, Sheldon, and Schkade in the journal Review of General Psychology. Genetic factors accounted for 50% in your happiness. 10% contributed by the circumstances around you. While the remaining 40% is determined by yourself. When compared, the search for happiness in the workplace is similar to oil painting:

    Have an innate talent in the arts is that genetic factors accounted for 50% of your happiness.
    You may by chance, to get oil paint, canvas, paint brushes and a different quality to what everyone else has. If you have good quality, it only accounted for 10% of happiness in your life.
    Apart from the two previous conditions, you can still make various forms of painting. You can convince yourself to learn on an expert to produce a beautiful painting. This is an action that is determined by your own to contribute 40% of happiness in your life.

Tips for Coloring Your Work Life Be Happy

You might argue that you are not a boss, so how can you add the element-stimulation happiness in the workplace? Excerpted from Positive Psychology News (28.09.11), here are some tips that might be useful:

Say thank you to your co-workers: A thank you would show your appreciation to colleagues. If you are responsible for the relationships of your staff, then make a thank you program will enhance positive emotional well-being and raise them.

We may say thank you in a little note and given to them. For example, "I give thanks to you who have given me useful information to complete the project," "Thank you for helping me to complete the project during my illness" and "Thank you for listening to my words and all forms of humor to entertain me ".

If your company does not have a thank you program, you can send it via email or send thank you notes to them directly. You will be able to cultivate an attitude of gratitude and increase your happiness in the workplace with your colleagues.

Find advantages within you: In the book Character strengths and virtues: A handbook and classification by Peterson and Seligman, there is a classification of strengths and virtues that enable humans to evolve through the study of Positive Psychology. There are six categories of human virtues: wisdom, courage, humanity, justice, temperance, and transcendence. You need to determine the character of the area where you are.

When the strength of your character is goodness, you might be able to join a social organization. If you do not find any social organization, you can ask your colleagues to do the social services together. This could give you a chance to show the strength of your character in your workplace and may increase your level of happiness in the workplace.

Develop social relationships in the workplace: Diener and Seligman in the journal Psychological Science found that good social relationships form a necessary condition for achieving happiness. You spend about 8 hours per day with colleagues. It can be used as momentum to establish social relationships with them and increase the happiness in the workplace. You can do a good morning greeting co-workers or even greet you when you meet in the hallway. Brief interactions actually trigger a touch of happiness and benefits contained in it.

happy with body shape, Depression Avoided


happy with body shape, Depression Avoided
United States, Psychologyx - Many teens, especially girls, think of your body shape and weight are important aspects for themselves. When your weight goes up or even too thin, these girls often experience stress.

This is further exacerbated by the fact a new study in the United States, says teenage girls who tend to feel satisfied on weight and body shape have a level of self-esteem is higher.

The research was conducted by Kerri Boutelle, a professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the University of California, San Diego, School of Medicine.

He said the study took 103 teenage girls who are overweight from survey data between the years 2004-2006.

The teenager was assessed from a variety of factors such as self-satisfaction on his body, self-esteem, symptoms of anxiety and depression, and weight control behaviors.

"We found that teenage girls who are very satisfied on the body tend not to control behavior such as poor weight gain, fasting, eating less food or vomit," said Boutelle, Monday (30/4).

Boutelle explains the positive relationship shown in this study may help interventions teenage girls with depression and anxiety due to being overweight. Enhance self-esteem on body weight and shape is one of the key.

The study, published in the Journal of Adolescent Health also showed that adolescent girls tend to be satisfied with the shape of the body, not easily affected by depression or other unhealthy behaviors.

"The focus of this study lies in improved self-image (self-image) as well as providing motivation and ability in an effective weight control, which can be formed to protect teenage girls from depression, anxiety or anger which is often associated with being overweight," said Boutelle .

2050, 115 Million People Will Have Dementia


2050, 115 Million People Will Have Dementia
Geneva, Psychology Zone - The case of dementia is expected to soar in coming decades, especially in poor countries. This statement was delivered by the World Health Organization (WHO).

A total of 35.6 million people have dementia in 2010, but the figure is expected to double to 65.7 million in 2030. While in 2050, their number will increase to three times the 115.4 million.

"The numbers are already very large and will increase more rapidly," said Dr. Shekhar Saxena, head of the WHO mental health division, Wednesday (11/4).

Most dementia patients cared for by relatives. Total expenditure of all patients for one year could reach 604 billion dollars. Financial burden is expected to increase even more rapidly than the number of cases.

"The costs are charged to millions of households will be included in the poverty line," said Margaret Chan, Director-General of the Agency.

Dementia is a brain disease that can affect memory, behavior and ability to perform everyday tasks and experienced by many people who reach the final adult. About 70 percent of cases are believed to be caused by Alzheimer's.

In recent decades, dementia has become a major public health issue in developed countries. But the population in poor and developing countries are projected to increase in coming decades.

WHO asks for more attention to public awareness and health services program. For those of poor and developing countries, cases of dementia will increase from 60 percent to 70 percent in 2050.

According to WHO, so far only eight countries including Britain, France and Japan have had a national program to cope with dementia. Some other countries like the United States has had a plan at the state level.

Meanwhile, Saxena makes specific recommendations for policy makers in countries of the world about how to deal with the challenges of dementia as soon as possible.

"Developing countries like China, India and Brazil have taken advantage of the health care system but do not have the capacity to handle the increase in the number of cases of dementia," said Saxena.

He said the need to ensure that doctors and nurses can see the early symptoms, due to lack of expertise in diagnosis can be a bottleneck in the process of handling. Even in developed countries, more than once dementia cases overlooked until the disease reaches its final stages.

One mistake that is perceived by the public is demesia not be prevented.

"Most people think of dementia as a normal sign of aging, and it's not true," Saxena said, "many older people have problems with their memory and cognitive, but dementia is a disease with symptoms that are more and more quickly."

When dementia is handled half-half or even ignored, people with dementia can become isolated and vulnerable,

Contributes 60 Percent of Memory Practices Children


Contributes 60 Percent of Memory Practices Children
Psychologyx - The method of teaching for children aged 1-6 years is not enough just through words, direct practice is one effective way. The child will more quickly understand when they are given the opportunity to make your own, because 60 percent of children came from memories of what he has done.

Affected child's memory of what they do, see and hear. Each portion has its own weight in the process of remembering, most of the action is about 60 percent, while 40 percent saw, and heard only 30 percent.

"The best course, if all three combined. Seeing, hearing, as well as doing it yourself will form 90 percent of the memories of children, "

Need for parents or early childhood education personnel to actively provide physical stimulation to the development of gross motor and fine evolved. Through vigorous activities, children are not a nerd who can only see and hear, but also apply.

This would be more effective because the kids usually love it when invited to play. Introduce physical activity as early as possible is not only beneficial psychologically, but also the physical ability and also the familiarity of the sport.

Physical stimulation is not limited to physical activity, but also include physical touch. When the child was a baby, massage - a gentle massage include physical stimulation and beneficial to the mental development of children at adulthood.

"If there are adults who are not romantic, never give flowers to their partners would have little time got a touch less. The more often invited to come into contact, the children will form the empathy while growing up, "

The Longevity Project, Best Book Awards Better Life

The Longevity Project, Best Book Awards Better Life
New York, Psychologyx - "The Longevity Project," a book written by Howard Friedman, a leading Professor of Psychology, and Leslie Martin, Professor of Psychology at La Sierra University, were awarded the best book in a Better Life Awards-16.

Book award in the Better Life Awards competition began in 1996 in the City-Southern, New York by the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. The event aims to inspire the community through the messages in a book in living their best lives.

Only five finalists were selected from 500 applicants for each of 10 categories. A wide range of categories, namely parenting, first book, green, inspirational memoir, psychology, relationships, spiritual, and wellness. At the time. The book "The Longevity Project" was declared as the winner in the category of "Wellness".

Winners were announced in a major event in New York City on March 12 last.

"The Longevity Project" tells the story of happiness and health for almost two decades of research conducted by Friedman and Martin, 1921, which was then refined by Louis Terman, psychologist from Stanford University.

Future studies involving more than 1,500 children, by collecting all the information about the family history, interactions with teachers, personality, hobbies, success, education level, and others.

Friedman and Martin said the most remarkable findings of their research is that personality characteristics and social relations as a child can predict a person's condition in adulthood.

Acknowledgments The Seldom Spoken


Acknowledgments The Seldom Spoken
English, Psychologyx - Greeting old 'thank you' more and more abandoned. Gradually replaced by modern words that are more impressed and more familiar.

Indeed, thanks underestimated, considered to carry a traditional feature when communicating with others. Increasingly sophisticated information technology to make a thank you was outdated and could no longer represent modernity.

A poll conducted in 2000 the English mind that the English say a thank-you almost 5,000 times a year. However, there is a pronounced shift in the sentence, starting with a variety of spoken sentences that seem modern. For example, 'merci', 'good', 'cool', even one wearing 'gracia' as an expression of thanks.

Two thousand people are considered old-fashioned thank-you and it's time ditiggalkan when conversing in a social environment. Director of the Food Network UK Nick Thorogood says, "We say 'thank you', people often find an effective way. Each person reacts differently. That's interesting, "he told the Daily Mail.

By 95 percent of poll participants said good manners by saying thank you is important. Eight out of ten Britons believe that they still have the label.

However, 1 in 10 people will not say thank you when a bad mood. When anger is the reason most often used to not say thank you. Meanwhile, when receiving bad service, they would rather silence than grateful.

Seventy per cent of Britons admit to say thank you when there is no intent whatsoever. While one-fifth of them away to say that sentence. A quarter of people prefer to express his gratitude through social networking, and a quarter again expressed through food.

On different sides, 85 percent of British people do not get annoyed when a thank you when appropriate action to take.

Knowing and Detecting Child Stress


 Psychologyx- Knowing and Detecting Child Stress
Child stress, what is normal and what is not? At some level, stress is a normal and healthy for children. In fact, officially called "eustress", is a healthy stress or stress that gives a positive feeling. Children who experience this stress, often the result of trying new things, maintain a relationship and daily routine.

Eustress encourages children forward and give them a sense of satisfaction. So do not worry about eustress. While distress need to be considered. This occurs when a child is not able to adapt or become overwhelmed by life circumstances or responsibility.

Distress typically have negative implications for children and need to be addressed early. Even stress can affect the child's emotional, behavioral and physical.

Quoted from GalTime, some behavioral characteristic that can detect the child's stress:

    Increased aggression
    Isolating from family and friends
    Often crying for a long time
    Sudden bedwetting
    Changes in eating and sleeping habits
    Frequent tantrums
    Nervousness or restlessness
    Stomach aches, headaches or other physical complaints
    Problems at school
    Anxious

Remember, all children may experience some of these behaviors at different points in their development. Let children know that stress is experienced by everyone and that feelings of anxiety, anger and loneliness are normal.

If this behavior still remain and cause significant anxiety, for example due to problems at school, it is worth contacting the school, a child psychologist or professional counselor.

Some clues to minimize stress in their lives children

    Do not underestimate the gift of sleep and nutrition. Not less than 8 hours of sleep each night. Reduce sugar and caffeine.
    Talk, talk, and talk. Set a regular time to talk with children about their friends, school and family. Even if you do not agree with their thoughts and feelings, it is enough to be a listener. The main core of the chat is issued feelings that may not be revealed. If not, then this is the main source of stress.
    Allow the child to physical activity. Entered in a team sport or cycling and walking are a must for successful management of stress.
    Prepare children for stressful situations. For example, prepare children to enter school waiting for the day after a long vacation by getting them to buy new books, etc..
    Do not go overboard in giving children a variety of activities. Children also need time to relax, enjoy play time. This can avoid the stress of children.
    Remember that we can not completely protect children from stress. Helping children when they have trouble stress is a remarkable gift to reduce their burden.

Why Some People More Easily Angered of the Other?

Psychologyx- Why Some People More Easily Angered of the Other?
According to Jerry Deffenbacher, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in anger management, some people are more "hotheaded" than others, they are easier and more powerful the emotion of anger blow than most people. There also are not showing their anger loudly, but the easily offended and become chronic.

People who are easily angered generally have a low tolerance for frustration, meaning they do not accept any discomfort, or anything that makes them irritated. They can not accept anything with a calm and they were very angry if the situation is not fair on them. For example, they get the correction only to a small error.

What makes people angry easily? One cause that can be attributed to genetic factors or physiological. There is evidence that some children do have a tendency born irritable, easily offended. Even the signs are there, already possessed from an early age.

Another factor is sociocultural. Anger is often regarded as negative, we may be taught to express anxiety, depression, or other emotions, but not to express anger. As a result, we do not learn how to handle it or channel it constructively.

The study also found that family background plays a role also in this case. Usually, people who are easily angered come from families with chaotic and not skilled in communication emosional.

How We Express Anger

Psychologyx- How We Express Anger
Natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Anger is a natural response, adaptive to threats, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors that allow us to fight and defend ourselves when we are attacked.

On the other hand, we can not physically attack on any person or object that irritates us. There is a law, social norms, and certain limits that restrict our anger.

Both conscious and unconscious, people use various processes to cope with their angry feelings. Three main approaches used to do a lot of people, as quoted from the American Psychological Association, is to express, suppress, and soothing.

Expressing anger in an assertive, not aggressive is a healthy way to express anger. To do this, you have to learn how you do it without hurting someone else. Being assertive does not mean being forced or demanding, you also have to respect yourself and others.

Anger can be suppressed, and then converted or redirected. This happens when you have control over your anger, stop thinking about it is, and focus on something positive. The goal is to inhibit or suppress your anger and convert it into more constructive behavior. Hitting without a channel can cause hypertension, high blood pressure, or depression.

Pent-up anger can create other problems. This can lead to pathological expressions, such as passive-aggressive behavior (anger to retaliate secretly) or a personality that seems to constantly cynical and hostile. People who constantly put others down, criticizing everything and making cynical comments, are those who have not learned how to express anger constructively. Not surprisingly, they are unlikely to have much contact with other people.

So, express your anger not only out of control behavior, but also controlling your internal responses, taking steps to lower your heart rate, calm yourself, and let your feelings to subside.

Something Deciding confused? Read This


Psychologyx- Something Deciding confused? Read This
Do I have to miss practice this morning? Or I need to sleep as much this holiday? Where's the most fun places for a date? Should I do the work in order to graduate from college soon? Deciding confused?

We all make many decisions every day, whether consciously or not. Sometimes, we do it automatically, either with little effort or thought for a moment. Unfortunately, not everyone is like that, there is also, take time for hours. Why do we make these choices?

Sometimes we make choices on our own, and at other times, the choice actually made for us. A journal of the Association for Psychological Science quoted by Science Daily, suggests that the opportunity to make a decision on a choice, making the brain associated with reward or benefit becomes active.

Actually, everything we do involves a decision on the options, even when we do not think at all about choice. For example, just by moving your legs to walk, it's already a decision on the option. Maybe you are not aware of this action, so that it becomes trivial. Different when there are people who stop you, until you decide to approach him or chose to leave.

In view of a choice, we tend to see it as a determinant of a favorable option. If we are confused in making a choice, then in fact we are not able to act to achieve our goals. So it takes less energy to deal with it.

So, when you are faced to make decisions, even from something as simple as choosing a blue or black tie for your business meeting, or choose a house where you live with your partner. Ask yourself is, who is in control of that decision, yourself, others, or you and him?

Smartphone, opponent or friend?


Psychologyx- Smartphone, opponent or friend?
Current with the various tools that are connected, we can do various things. Research, make an appointment, talk with friends, shopping around the world or just play games. Simply direct the pointer and click. Voila! A simple and fun way.

One time, we had lunch with colleagues at a cafe that provides wifi. While waiting for food to come, we busied ourselves with sending sms, browsing, or just open Facebook or Twitter. Our colleagues do not want to lose. He opened the laptop and busied himself. Communication was cut off. On the other hand, without us knowing it, the food that was ordered has arrived and cooled.

This case, happens to most of them are using smartphones. With a gadget that is always connected and responsive will allow us to check various things online. However, at some point, we become dependent and feel obligated to get connected. Finally, the online habits unconsciously we have become an addiction.

According to Alana Conner, a psychologist, this addiction will make it difficult to determine which one becomes a priority. Online or offline lives life should take precedence. He stated, they must be balanced. Too heavily on one of them will not make us better. Conner added that the smartphone is not the enemy or opponent who must be destroyed. we should learn to master it, not mastered.

Existentialism psychology


Existentialism psychology
In the book History and Systems of Psychology by James F. Brennan in 2006, psychology, existentialism is a school of psychology that is rooted in various philosophical works in the second half of the 19th century, especially Soren Kierkegaard and Friedrich Nietzsche. However, the need to realize is that both have mindset that is very contradictory. Kierkegaard merstorasi interested in the depth of faith in the religions that have been dried up in the middle of the Copenhagen at the time. While Nietzsche's famous statement "God is dead".

Only, the differences were not as big as their differences with the earlier philosophers. They approached philosophy from the viewpoint of real human beings, human beings are involved in a variety of life challenges. Both believed that human existence can not be standardized into a rational system, religious or philosophical.

Existentialism different psychological approaches to positivistic. When the positivistic, they tried to get out of the subjectivity and see things as they are. But the existentialists believe that we can never get out of subjectivity. We can not separate subjectivity with objectivity, because they are related to each other.

The existentialist advise us to let whatever we examine. Whether it's objects, feelings, thoughts, or even human existence itself to reveal itself to us. This can be done by opening up to experience, by accepting it, although not in accordance with the philosophy, theory, or our beliefs.

Existentialist became famous for his belief that life is difficult. Physical world can give us the misery as well as give us pleasure. Social world leads us to the disappointment and loneliness as well as make us happy because of your love and affection from others.

In summary, psychological existentialism emphasizes the need to be as close as possible to the world that lived and experienced in everyday life. No need to use the theory, statistics, reduction or experiment. It is preferred that need to know what we are talking about.

But, psychology, existentialism is not really recognized as a research method. This is due to existential psychology is considered unscientific. Does not have a hypothesis or statistics. Not depend on the dependent or independent variable.

In addition, there are often misinterpreted due to a variety of the terms derived from the philosophical tradition that is only familiar with the philosophers, not psychologists. This is compounded because some of the term comes from the German and French languages ​​are very difficult to find its equivalent in English

Multiple Intelligence, Howard Gardner


Psychologyx-  Multiple Intelligence, Howard Gardner
Howard Gardner says that there are seven categories in which each person has the advantages or disadvantages in that category. He calls this division as multiple intelligences. Gardner conduct further research on Alfred Bine research completed in France in 1900, at Harvard University.

The results of the study Binet, the basis on the establishment of an intelligence test. IQ (Intellegence Quotient) is the result of measurement by Binet.
Intelligence test this model became the basis for developing a test that is quite popular in the United States, Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT),
SAT and Binet tests produce two types of intelligence, verbal and math. If a person can do both well, he will be 'smart' and have a better chance to go to college. However, what if that does not?

Gardner proposes that there are other intelligences besides these two. The purpose of Gardner is that we are not fixated on two things. Thus, we can help your child progress with better. In addition, we can find an appropriate activity for your child to develop optimally.

Here's Multiple Intelligences Howard Gardner proposed:

    Kinesthetic, using the body to solve problems, express ideas and feelings. Actors, athletes, dancers, sculptors, and mechanics have a more powerful kinesthetic intelligence.
    Interpersonal, understanding mood, feelings and needs with others. These include, salesman, teacher, counselor, and the people who we call when we need.
    Intrapersonal, able to understand ourselves with the development of good self and use it to bring yourself toward better.
    Linguistics, has advantages in the use of words. Commonly associated with storytellers, politicians, comedians, and writers.
    Logical-mathematical, understand and be able to use numbers effectively. And able to describe the problem well. Researchers, programmers, and accountants here.
    Musicals, like to deal with the music. It's found in many areas such as, composers, critics and music lovers.
    Spatial, visual spatial ability (understanding of the space) is accurate, so that they can work effectively.

Hopefully, once we understand, we can educate your child better and without paksaan.SAT and Binet tests produce two types of intelligence, verbal and math. If a person can do both well, he will be 'smart' and have a better chance to go to college. However, what if that does not?

Gardner proposes that there are other intelligences besides these two. The purpose of Gardner is that we are not fixated on two things. Thus, we can help your child progress with better. In addition, we can find an appropriate activity for your child to develop optimally.

7 Way to Find Inspiration When Stress

Psychologyx-  7 Way to Find Inspiration When Stress
Emotions high in a life of this crisis make the most of the stress. Of course this is not good for mental health and can result in declining physical condition.

Stress will tend to cover all forms of our mind, including a better chance in life and work. Our view is closed because we are out of your comfort zone.

Regardless of your struggle today, here are seven strategies reported by Galt Time to find inspiration and help you rebuild the excitement, comfort and realization of your dreams.

Surround yourself with inspiring people
There are many people around us who want everyday regardless of their current condition and wanted to go ahead with the search for confidence and optimism. You can find new ways to interact in your community. Unconsciously, you'll connect with others who inspire you. Although you may have a few friends, but you do will uplift and inspire you every day.

Do something you love every day
Everyone has something they like. This can help them get through tough times. For example, music helps us to calm down. Listening to music can fill our souls, reminding us what is the concern, motivation and the pursuit of life with more focus, passion and humility.

Serve others
Regardless of how bad your life, give your time to help others. It can make you feel useful and appear as part of their feelings. Isolating yourself will only make your psychological condition. So, build relationships and Contribute in it. It can also be done for those who are depressed and do not know what the meaning of their lives.

Staying organized
When the stress comes, it's easy to lose passion. Time, documents, schedules, and appointments as if lost abysmally falling into a black hole. Do not let chaos be your new best friend. Trying to remain professional and well organized. Nothing is our time for hours unless you try to rebuild damaged tissue to escape from adversity.

Move your body, move your life
Sport is an ideal and important to do at any time, during periods of stress, it becomes necessary. In some studies suggest, exercise can release chemicals that make less stressful conditions. In fact, even the simplest exercise can make your mood more focused and clear.

Forgive yourself
Receiving the field is the right choice in the face of everything that is not going as expected. Finances and your life may not be changed drastically by doing this, but you will find a new life. You may be aware that everything happens for a reason and wisdom behind it.

Open yourself to new possibilities
Open up yourself to create a vision that is truly new about how your life later. Focus, look at the value of what you get, not what happens to you at this time.

Faced with anger children


 Psychologyx- Faced with anger children
Child deal with anger can be a complicated, exhausting and stressful for most adults. In fact, one of the problems when your child deal with anger is that we go mad.

This is because we are not accustomed to deal with anger. Since childhood, we are taught that anger is a bad thing. To this end, we have an idea that anger is a very bad thing and often feel guilty when showing anger.

It would be easier to deal with the anger of the child, if we understand what we do. The purpose of what we do is not to curb or destroy angry feelings. But to help the receiving end and flow into the building.

We must allow the child to feel their feelings. And anger is a form of strong emotion that should not be ignored. Anger, should be identified and treated well.

To face the anger of the child. We need to know what's what caused it. Anger can be caused by pain, failure, low self-esteem or anxiety associated with going to a situation that is difficult to control the little guy.

Remember, that little ability to express emotions not as an adult. So sometimes, need to look further, if your child angry or sad

How to Train Child discipline


Psychologyx-  How to Train Child discipline
Discipline is a thing that must be instilled from an early age. However, often, parents do it in a less precise. Thus, the result, the child is not discipline. Instead tend to rebel and fight.

Here are some tips presented by childdevelopmentinfo and can be a solution for you in the training of child discipline:

 1.   Make time to do fun things with your child.
  2.  Do not argue with your partner about what should or should not be done in front of the child.
  3.  Never give a command or a request that can not be done at that time.
   4. Consistent in giving reward or punishment.
  5.  Agree on behavior that may or may not be done with your baby and partner.
  6.  Explain as clearly as possible to the child what will we do when he does things that are not true.
  7.  Explain as clearly as possible what is less true of the little guy. Not enough to simply say "messy room". We have to explain what a mess it is, "Do not put dirty clothes on the floor, dirty dishes on the table and help make up your bed".
 8.   Remember, that your child will imitate us. Be a good model for your child.
  9.  Whenever possible, give a gift when your child doing a good example, with honors, caresses, or maybe the money.
  10.  Both parents must play an active role in doing this.

What's the Difference Anger Men and Women?


 Psychologyx- What's the Difference Anger Men and Women?
Scientists have claimed that anger was one of the basic human emotions. Anger is also a hallmark of human beings, whether male or female.

Experiments have been carried out repeatedly by experts and indicate that men and women have the same mechanism to express negative emotions. However, the effect of the anger of women and men is seen differently by others.

As quoted from Genius Beauty, psychology proves an angry man who would make a strong impression on others and seem determined by their active lifestyles. However, an angry woman, by contrast, considered the behavior and character that is inappropriate.

The same conclusion has been made by experts in a simple experiment: A man and a woman asked to get into a situation that would require them to be angry. The anger is directed at their boss as a way of demanding higher wages.

Groups of respondents are witnessing this simple experiment, and then evaluate the action on each volunteer men and women.

The majority of respondents felt that the form of anger in men over the delivery of sensation firmness, strength, and determination. In contrast to the assessment in women, when they demanded a salary with a high tone to give the perception that women can not control themselves, hysterical and incompetent.

Research published by the Journal Science has concluded that women tend to feel embarrassed to show their anger, while men consider this a very natural and normal.

When 2-year-old child, "Men and Women's Different"


 Psychologyx- When 2-year-old child, "Men and Women's Different"
At the age of 2 years, your child will realize that his father and mother are different. Your child's curiosity about sex and women develop at this age. The child began to understand that he is a male or female.

Six months after the second birthday, your child will be busy asking about sex. "You male or female? Why women? "Or" Men should not wear hair clips, why? ". And a variety of questions and we will be tired of boring answer.

But this is a phase of learning for your child. He attempted to distinguish between women and men. Answers such as "women have the ribbon in her hair" or "the man had a mustache", the child will be studied to characterize the two different sexes.

It would be better if we explain the gender differences with caution. Let us not say "she's a woman because she was whiny" or "her son because of love turned upside down."

When 1 year old child, "Hold it, Achieve it"


 Psychologyx- When 1 year old child, "Hold it, Achieve it"
When the child was one year old, your baby is a little explorer. Explore every corner of the house is a favorite activity. Your child into the world's busiest creatures. He walked along, his hands trying to grab anything. Displays and sculpture collection is taken and thrown away. Embraced and plates and glasses were thrown to the floor.

This indicates he began to coordinate eyes and hands. Eye to the brain that transmit data and signals to the hand to do things according to his will. When viewing an item immediately attracted the attention of his hand will grab the goods.

Your child needs to develop the ability to coordinate eyes and hands of course we should meet. We need not sacrifice display-displays in our home. Moreover, the pieces could hurt the kecil.Sebaiknya we do not shout "No!" To the child. The word "do" this will hinder the development of the child. Fear of making it lazy or unwilling to find out and explore the world around.

Here are some things we can do to keep your baby:

1. Distanced breakable ornaments from your child.
2. Replace the temporary display of ceramics, glass or crystal with ornaments made of rubber or wood that is not sharp.
3. Explain the usefulness of existing items in the house. Better to say "Adek should hold this, but it may be discarded or thrown ga ya? Ga damaged and could later be used again ... ".
4. Supervise your child go anywhere, so safety maintained.

How to Choose Works the Career Roads


Psychologyx- How to Choose Works the Career  Roads
Not a few people are confused and think a thousand times in choosing a job to support their careers. Many of them are still in the stage of the selection of careers, such as school and university students. Wrote this work could be done until their retirement age to come.

The school term is a period where we will explore more specific scientific fields. At the time this is the perfect opportunity to determine our decisions. Here are tips from Campus Grotto cited that could be considered.

Consider a hobby
We will be able to work productively when choosing a job that is consistent with what we like. If you love to write, then the job might be fun is a journalist, novelist, teacher, etc.

Consider the job opportunities
We can do a little research with the help of google search engine. How to view job opportunities next five years. Currently, the development of computer technology and further develop, as well as the demand for health such as nurses and doctors. Perform consideration by looking at the types of jobs that only lasted a couple of time.

Follow the self-test capability
If you are lost with yourself, try to test the potential interest and aptitude or personality tests. Some test results can give us about what kind of work that we fit. This can be used as a way of narrowing the options may be selected.

Follow the job fair
When attending a job fair, use this time to dig deeper into various types of work that is being offered, ranging from the qualifications, salary, and conformance with us. By knowing more deeply, we can create a strategy to target job positions

The importance of role of father in Phase Lactation


The importance of role of father in Phase Lactation
Psychologyx- It is no secret, in the process of breastfeeding, the mother is the central figure and is considered the only important figure. While the father role as breadwinner in order to buy the various needs of the baby. But is it the role of father as breadwinner is just?

First, some twenty years ago, a taboo subject when my father helped replace diapers, bathing or cleaning a child. But now times have changed. Father role was increased. A father, should be ready to help my mother to care for babies with full awareness.

It is well known that the production of breast milk (ASI) is closely related to mother's mental condition. If a mother feels anxious, depressed and afraid of milk produced will be less. As a result, the child will lack the milk that led to the lack of nutrition and the negative impact on growth. Although even breast milk can be substituted with formula, breast milk remains the best source of nutrition.

Fathers' involvement began when she can breastfeed your baby. Nursing process this will become an enjoyable ritual between mother, father and child. Fathers show affection and attention to mother and child will make the mother feel calm and protected. Comfortable feeling that makes the mother motivated and consequently, milk production will be smooth and abundant.

This is where the father plays an important role in the process of breastfeeding. As a father figure and protector of the family head will make mothers feel not alone when caring for your child.

In addition to the time of breastfeeding, the interactions are conducted by the father will be different to that of the mother. When the father while the mother tends communicative cuddle or interact with the physical game. In terms of infant development, a great physical energy will offset the father's mother's gentle touch. Differences in style is what makes your child a rich experience.

Thus, the child will be more intelligent and closer to both parents. It is no secret, in the process of breastfeeding, the mother is the central figure and is considered the only important figure. While the father role as breadwinner in order to buy the various needs of the baby. But is it the role of father as breadwinner is just?

First, some twenty years ago, a taboo subject when my father helped replace diapers, bathing or cleaning a child. But now times have changed. Father role was increased. A father, should be ready to help my mother to care for babies with full awareness.

It is well known that the production of breast milk (ASI) is closely related to mother's mental condition. If a mother feels anxious, depressed and afraid of milk produced will be less. As a result, the child will lack the milk that led to the lack of nutrition and the negative impact on growth. Although even breast milk can be substituted with formula, breast milk remains the best source of nutrition.

Fathers' involvement began when she can breastfeed your baby. Nursing process this will become an enjoyable ritual between mother, father and child. Fathers show affection and attention to mother and child will make the mother feel calm and protected. Comfortable feeling that makes the mother motivated and consequently, milk production will be smooth and abundant.

This is where the father plays an important role in the process of breastfeeding. As a father figure and protector of the family head will make mothers feel not alone when caring for your child.

In addition to the time of breastfeeding, the interactions are conducted by the father will be different to that of the mother. When the father while the mother tends communicative cuddle or interact with the physical game. In terms of infant development, a great physical energy will offset the father's mother's gentle touch. Differences in style is what makes your child a rich experience.

Thus, the child will be more intelligent and closer to both parents.

Children's achievement or ambition Parents?


Children's achievement or ambition Parents?
Psychologyx- When we observe, from an early age children have been introduced to the competition. The form also varied, ranging from race, contest, competition until the Olympic games. Is intended that the child has a mental competitive and not easy to give up. In addition, the school did not want to miss. A variety of programs prepared for the child to be a winner.

Latest programs created by the school is RSBI or International Standard School stubs. Not a few parents who are trying to put their children into schools with international standards. The high cost is not an obstacle.

Without the parents knowing it, the attitude of ambitious parents often make a child locked in stressful situations. This ambition can be a demanding attitude of the child to excel in a field. Quite often, when children fail to reach the target, the child would be considered stupid and fail. Compensation, the parents would scold, "insulting", or sarcastic. In addition, children will be included additional guidance and lessons learned in order to not fall behind.

Hours studying the long-term increasing, 8 hours at school still must be added a few more hours outside of school. Situations like this, it could be stressful for children because he did not have a chance to play and socialize. Children grow up in fear to fail and make mistakes.

These feelings into a distress for the child. If the child continues to feel depressed, positive activities that included a parent will be a scourge. It could be, the child will be absent, and use a variety of reasons to avoid these activities.

If you have this, the dream of academic achievement to get a good living to be memorable. Achievement motivation, the child will go down and replaced by feelings of anxiety and fear failure. This condition, make the child reluctant to try to score brilliantly. It is quite possible, the child will fail to achieve performance and not the next grade.

Of course this is not akhirbyang we expect. We all hope that the child will have a brilliant achievement and pride can be a parent. If necessary, the child can carry the name of the nation into the international realm. To that end, parents need to support the child. Attention, the environment, health, and nutrition to be one essential for success.

However, that need to be emphasized is that parents need to remember, that what they do is for the betterment of children. Not for ambition or personal obsession. Do not let the children feel pressured and uncomfortable in life. Let them choose what is best for them.

If the child is an arrow, then the parent is the bow. The task of parents is to provide encouragement and directing, not force! When we observe, from an early age children have been introduced to the competition. The form also varied, ranging from race, contest, competition until the Olympic games. Is intended that the child has a mental competitive and not easy to give up. In addition, the school did not want to miss. A variety of programs prepared for the child to be a winner.

Latest programs created by the school is RSBI or International Standard School stubs. Not a few parents who are trying to put their children into schools with international standards. The high cost is not an obstacle.

Without the parents knowing it, the attitude of ambitious parents often make a child locked in stressful situations. This ambition can be a demanding attitude of the child to excel in a field. Quite often, when children fail to reach the target, the child would be considered stupid and fail. Compensation, the parents would scold, "insulting", or sarcastic. In addition, children will be included additional guidance and lessons learned in order to not fall behind.

Hours studying the long-term increasing, 8 hours at school still must be added a few more hours outside of school. Situations like this, it could be stressful for children because he did not have a chance to play and socialize. Children grow up in fear to fail and make mistakes.

These feelings into a distress for the child. If the child continues to feel depressed, positive activities that included a parent will be a scourge. It could be, the child will be absent, and use a variety of reasons to avoid these activities.

If you have this, the dream of academic achievement to get a good living to be memorable. Achievement motivation, the child will go down and replaced by feelings of anxiety and fear failure. This condition, make the child reluctant to try to score brilliantly. It is quite possible, the child will fail to achieve performance and not the next grade.

Of course this is not akhirbyang we expect. We all hope that the child will have a brilliant achievement and pride can be a parent. If necessary, the child can carry the name of the nation into the international realm. To that end, parents need to support the child. Attention, the environment, health, and nutrition to be one essential for success.

However, that need to be emphasized is that parents need to remember, that what they do is for the betterment of children. Not for ambition or personal obsession. Do not let the children feel pressured and uncomfortable in life. Let them choose what is best for them.

If the child is an arrow, then the parent is the bow. The task of parents is to provide encouragement and directing, not force!

Love in Psychology


Love in Psychology
Love in Psychology, Psychologyx - If you want to know what love is in terms of psychology, then you're in the right place. Some of you may have its own meaning of love, but love in psychology will further assist you in understanding the complete love.

Triangular Theory of Love is a theory that discusses the meaning, aspect and other types of love. This theory was put forward by Sternberg in the journal Psychological Review, entitled "A triangular theory of love" in 1986.

Love, according to Sternberg's Triangular Theory, consists of three aspects: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Perfect love is love that meets all three of these aspects. Here is an explanation of each aspect.

Passion (passion) tend to occur early in a relationship, relatively quickly and then move at a steady rate as a result of habituation.

Intimacy (intimacy) is relatively slow and then gradually manifest as an increase interpersonal bonding. Changing circumstances can enable intimacy, which can lead to decreased intimacy or just getting up.

Commitment (commitment) increases relatively slowly at first, then walked quickly, and will gradually settle. When a relationship fails, the level of commitment usually decreases gradually and disappear.

Based on these three aspects, not everyone qualifies a perfect love. They could only meet one or two of these three aspects. What if only met one or two aspects? Stenberg share the love of some kind on which aspects are met. These are the kind of love or the type of love expressed by Stenberg.

Love According to Psychology

1. Liking (liking) is not interpreted in terms of the trivial. Sternberg said that
like in this case is the hallmark of true friendship, in which a person's sense of attachment, warmth, and closeness with another but not intense passion or commitment in the long run. Terms of the nature of love is the fulfillment of intimacy.

2. Crazy love (Infatuated love) is often perceived as "love at first sight." But without the aspect of intimacy and commitment in love, crazy love may disappear suddenly. Terms of mad love is the appearance of intimacy and commitment.

3. Love is empty (Empty Love). Sometimes, love came without any sense of intimacy and passion and it is called with an empty love. This type of love there to be committed without any feeling of intimacy and passion diatara them. This usually occurs when there is cultural match and often preceded by the type of love is empty.

4. Romantic love (romantic love). Those who have a romantic love will be bound emotionally (as in number 1) and the passion with one another. Terms of romantic love is the appearance of intimacy and passion (passion).

5. Couples in love (love Companionate) often found in marriages, in which the passion is no longer visible, but a deep affection and commitment remain. Companionate love is generally a relationship between you and the person who lived together, but with no sexual or physical desire. It is stronger than friendship because in this connection there is an element of commitment. One example of love that is in a family is a form of companionate love, as well as those who spend a lot of time together but no sex and passion there.

6. Love fool (Fatuous love) can be exemplified as courtship and marriage in the rift,
where there is still a commitment of love and passion, without any influence of such attachment intimacy, warmth, and closeness.

7. Perfect love (Consummate love) is the full form of a love. This is an ideal type, and many people want to achieve it. Sternberg warned, maintaining a perfect love may be more difficult than achieving it. Perfect love may not be permanent. For example, if the passion is missing from time to time, may turn into companionate love.

Sternberg balance between the three aspects, namely intimacy, passion and commitment in love tend to shift and dynamic. Knowledge about aspects of love can help couples avoid the problems in their relationship. Well, you are including which ones?

stress


Often stress is defined by just looking from the stimulus or the response of someone. Definition of the stress stimulus in an environment focused on events such as natural disasters, hazardous conditions, disease, or quit working. This definition involves the assumption that the situation was very stressful but do not pay attention to individual differences in evaluating events. While the definition of the stress response refers to the state of stress, a person's reaction to stress, or are in a state under stress (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984).

Definition of stress by just looking from the stimulus experienced by a person, has its limitations because it does not pay attention to individual differences that affect the assumptions regarding the stressors. Whereas if the stress is defined from the response, then there is no systematic way to identify which ones will be a stressor and what does not. To recognize it, need to see the reaction that occurs first. In addition, many responses may indicate that psychological stress when in fact it is not a psychological stress. Of explanation, it seems that the response can not be reliably assessed in response to psychological stress in the absence of a reference stimulus (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984).

In short, all the stimulus-response approach refers to the crucial question about the stimulus that generates a certain stress responses and responses that indicate certain stressors. Which defines the stress is the stimulus-response relationships were observed, not the stimulus or response. Stimulus if the stimulus is a stressor produces a stressful response, and stressful to say the response when the response is generated by the demands, whipping, threats or load. Therefore, stress is a relationship between the individual and the environment by individuals considered a burden or exceed its strength and threatening the health (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984).

Resilieance I Can


Resilieance
I Can
Can I factor is one's social and interpersonal competence. The sections of this factor is to organize the feelings and stimuli in which individuals can identify their feelings, recognize different types of emotions, and express it in words and behavior, but do not use violence to the feelings and rights of others and the self. Individuals can also set the incentive to hit, 'vague', damaged goods, or perform actions that are not pleasant.

Looking for a trustworthy relationship where individuals can find someone such as parents, siblings, peers for help, share your feelings and concerns, in order to find the best way to discuss and resolve personal and interpersonal issues.

Another source is the skill of communication in which individuals are able to express a wide range of thoughts and feelings to others and to hear what others say and feel the feelings of others.

Temperament measure yourself and others in which individuals understand their own temperament (how to behave, stimulating, and take a risk or silent, reflexes and be careful) and also to the temperament of others. This helps individuals to find out how long it takes to communicate, helping individuals to find the speed to react, and how many individuals are able to succeed in a variety of situations.

The last part is the ability to solve problems. Individuals can assess a natural problem and find out what they need in order to solve the problem and what help they need from others. Individuals can discuss various issues with others and find the most appropriate problem solving and fun. Individuals are constantly sticking with a problem until the problem is solved.

Resilieance. I Have


Resilieance
I Have
This aspect is a source of external assistance and that increases resilience.

The sources are encouraged to be independent, in which both individuals are independent and are still hanging with the family, consistently able to get services such as hospital, physician, or other similar services.

Structure and rules of the house, every family has rules that must be followed, if a family member who does not comply with these rules shall be given an explanation or penalty. Conversely, if the family members comply with these rules shall be given credit.

Role Models is also a source of factor I Have the people who can show what individuals should do such things and information to encourage individuals to follow.

The last source is having a relationship. The people closest to the individual such as a husband, children, parents are people who love and accept the individual. But individuals also need love and support of others who sometimes can meet the needs of the less compassion than the people closest to them.

Resilieance. I Am


I Am a strength factor that comes from within, such as feelings, behaviors and beliefs contained in a person. I Am a factor composed of several parts, among others; proud of yourself, feeling loved and attractive manner, individuals with hope, faith, and faith, love, empathy and altruistic, the latter is independent and responsible.

In the following, will be explained one by one on the parts of the factors I Am.

Proud of myself; individuals know that they are an important and proud of who they were and whatever they are doing or will be achieved. Individuals will not let others belittle or humiliate them. When individuals have problems in life, confidence and self esteem to help them to survive and overcome the problem.

Feeling loved and attractive manner; Individuals who would have liked and loved. Individuals will be kind to those who liked and loved. A person can adjust the attitude and behavior when faced with different responses when talking to other people. The other part is filled with hope, faith, and trust. Individual believes there is hope for them, as well as other people and institutions can be trusted. Individuals to feel what is right or wrong, and want to participate in it. Individuals have the confidence and faith in the moral and good, and can express it as a belief in God and the people who have a higher spiritual.

Love, empathy, altruistic, ie, when someone loves someone else and express love in different ways. Individuals care about what happens to other people and express through behavior or words. Individuals feel the discomfort and suffering of others and want to do something to stop or to share the pain or provide comfort.

The last section is independent and responsible. Individuals can do various things according to their wishes and accept the consequences and behavior. Individuals felt that he could become independent and responsible for it. Individuals understand the limits of their control of various activities and knowing when someone else is responsible.

Resilieance

There are individuals who are able to survive and recover from adverse situations effectively while other individuals fail because they do not work out of unfavorable situations. Ability to continue to live after the unfortunate or after heavy pressure was not a fortune, but it illustrates the ability of certain individuals who are known by the term resilience (Tugade & Fredrikson, 2004).
UnderstandingThe term resilience was first formulated by Block (in Klohnen, 1996) with the name of ego-resilience, which is defined as a general ability that involves the ability of self-adjustment and flexible when faced with internal and external pressures. Specifically, the ego-resilience are:"... That a personality resource allows individuals to Modify Their characteristic level and habitual mode of expression of ego-control as the most adaptively encounter, shape and function in Their immediate and long term environmental context. (Block, in Klohnen, 1996, p.45).
From the foregoing definitions, it appears that ego resiliency is a personality resource that serves to form the environmental context of short and long term, where resources allow individuals to modify the level of character and ego control to express what they did.
In a way, the term resilience has expanded in terms of meaning. Starting with research Rutter & Garmezy (in Klohnen, 1996), about children who are able to survive in a stressful situation. Two researchers on the use of the term resilience as a descriptive labels they use to describe children who are able to function properly even though they live in poor and stressful environments.
Wolff (in Banaag, 2002), looking at resilience as a trait. According to him, this trait is hidden capacity that appears to protect against the destruction of individuals and individuals of all obstacles of life. Individuals who have good intelligence, adaptable, social temperament, and an interesting personality ultimately contribute consistently to its own self-esteem, competence, and the feeling that he was lucky. Individuals are resilient individuals.
Grotberg (1995), on the other hand explains that resilience is the capacity that is universal, and with that capacity, individual, group or community is able to prevent, minimize or negate the effect of which can be damaging when they were hit by disasters or misfortune.
Resilience is also called by Wolin and Wolin (in Bautista, Roldan & Bascal, 2001), as a coping skill when faced with the challenge of life or an individual's capacity to remain "healthy" (wellness) and continue to improve themselves (self repair).
Lazarus (in Tugade & Fredrikson, 2004), the analogies with the resilience elasticity of the metal. For example, printing a lot of iron containing carbon is very hard but brittle or break easily (not resilient), while wrought iron contains less carbon, so soft and easily shaped according to need (resilient). Parable can be applied to distinguish individuals who have the endurance and not when faced with psychological distress associated with negative experiences.
Banaag (2002), states that resilience is a process of interaction between individual factors with environmental factors. These factors serve to hold individual self-destruction and self-perform construction positively, whereas environmental factors serve to protect individuals and "soften" the difficulty of living individuals.
Liquanti (1992), mentioning in particular that the resilience in adolescents is the capabilities of the youth in which they do not relent in the face of pressure and the difference in the environment. They were able to avoid drug use, delinquency, school failure, and of mental disorders.
Masten & Coatswerth (in Davis, 1999), said that the resilience needed to identify the two conditions, namely that the first significant threat to the individual (the threat of high risk status or unfortunate and chronic trauma) and the second is the quality of adaptation or development individuals classified as good (the individual behaves in a manner compotent).
Resilience factorsMany studies that sought to identify factors that influence a person's resilience. These factors include external support and resources that exist in a person (eg family, caregivers institutions in this case that protects women), personal power is developing in a person (such as self-esteem, a capacity for self-monitoring, spirituality and altruism), and social skills (such as conflict resolution, communication skills).
Grotberg (1995), suggests that resilience factors identified by different sources. For the power of the individual, in private use the term 'I Am', for external support and resources, used the term 'I Have', while for the interpersonal skills used istilah'I Can '.
The following will explain the resilience factors that can describe the resilience of the individual. I Am, I Have, I Can is a characteristic to increase the resilience of the principal investigator of the International Resilieance Project (Grotberg, 1995).




  • I Am
  • I Have
  • I Can
Each factor of the I Am, I Have, I Can contribute to a wide range of actions that can increase the potential for resilience. Resilient individuals who do not need all the resources of each factor, but if the individual has only one individual factor can not be said to be the individual who beresiliensi, for example, individuals who are able to communicate well (I Can) but he does not have a close relationship with the other (I Have) and can not love others (I Am), it does not include people who Resilieance
 
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